You may have noticed that lately I have been feeling a bit bogged down. Other than being pregnant and coworkers taking summer vacations, nothing going on around here has been out of the ordinary. But I seem to be fighting an uphill battle still. Just thinking about the tiniest things I need to get done turns them instantly into some insurmountable task. My proudest accomplishments for the last month are:
1. Reading the new David Sedaris book cover to cover.
2. Getting the patio cleaned off enough that it is functional.
3. Re-potting the orchids I got for Valentines Day that were languishing in plastic pots.
Actually, now that I wrote them down, they do make me a bit happier. I HAVE done something in the past month.
A topic I have beaten nearly to death on my blog is that I am an over thinker. Over planner, over doer, over everything. While I am a right-brainer in nearly every way, my left brain is mean and loud and pushy. So that leads to some conflict. Often, instead of diving into a project, I plan it…to death. I start out planning for good reasons. Do I have all the materials? Do I have the time? But then sometimes (or lately, all the time), it turns into micromanaging that ends up in nothing getting done. Which then leads to me feeling sad and embarassed. Which leads into me chastizing myself for not writing more often or using my creative skills. I really rule at guilting myself. But I’m working on it.
If you’re asking yourself when the inspiration, starts, it is here. I’m not sharing my less then awesome feelings to drag anyone down. Lately, I have been attempting to not bottle up the feelings I have lingering below the surface. And I know whenever I read a blog entry I can identify with, I always feel a bit better. So my plan for this weekend is to stay home and actually DO stuff. Stop planning, latch onto the first project I see and just do it. And of course take nap breaks and park breaks. Then, this Sunday evening, hopefully I will have something fun to share with everyone.
If you’ve been in a rut lately, why not dive in with me? Just fond something and do it. If it turns out less than perfect, oh well. At least you did something and learned along the way. I’m not going to set a specific goal this time since that is just going to lead down the wrong path right now. All I will do is…do.
See you in a few days!